There's no such thing as sadness, because life's a joke. And jokes are not supposed to be sad, they're supposed to be fun!
So whenever you feel sad, just laugh.
And whenever you feel mad, just laugh.
And whenever you feel (increasing volume) any other thing than happiness, (shouting) just motherfucking laugh!
Because there's no need to ever be sad, or mad. You just have to be happy.
So just laugh.
Just... (shouting) motherfucking (spacing out) laugh 

That's it, until the day you die.
And let me tell you, there's no happier day in a person's life than the day they die. Because although life's a joke, and jokes are fun, people get tired.
They get tired of hearing the same (shouting) motherfucking joke all over again!
(almost laughing) Until they just can't take it anymore! And they can't laugh.

But as long as you can, just remember... To always... (shouting) motherfucking...
(almost giggling) laugh.