(1:37:31 PM) Phil: bahh (1:37:31 PM) Quincy : I'm not here right now (2:32:24 PM) Phil: can we go somewhere, im not going to pry even though on like wed I said I would (2:32:24 PM) Quincy : I'm not here right now (2:35:32 PM) Phil: no that was wed (2:35:35 PM) Phil: but yea w/e (2:37:02 PM) Phil: dr quin (2:37:06 PM) Phil: medicine woman (6:35:39 PM) Quincy: ? (6:35:39 PM) Phil : I'm not here right now (6:36:06 PM) Phil: heyo (6:36:12 PM) Quincy: hi (6:36:24 PM) Phil: are you like busy (6:36:27 PM) Phil: with dinner or w/e (6:36:53 PM) Quincy: i need to do a lab safety training thing soon (6:36:54 PM) Quincy: but what sup (6:36:59 PM) Phil: buh (6:37:09 PM) Phil: I just wanted to talk at you (6:37:19 PM) Quincy: ok so talk (6:37:43 PM) Phil: well I wanted to vent one thing on Thursday (6:37:50 PM) Phil: then a different thing on Friday (6:37:59 PM) Phil: then a different thing 5 hours ago (6:38:03 PM) Quincy: damn (6:38:13 PM) Quincy: this is why you should switch to teamspeak (6:38:15 PM) Quincy: vent is bad for you (6:38:25 PM) Phil: YEA I GUESS (6:38:53 PM) Phil: I guess ill bring you up to speed (6:38:59 PM) Phil: although it'll take shorter this time (6:39:00 PM) Phil: bc (6:39:02 PM) Phil: I fucking love (6:39:07 PM) Phil: brining you up to speed (6:39:11 PM) Quincy: okay (6:39:18 PM) Quincy: i'll have you know, i quit drugs though (6:39:25 PM) Phil: ah shit (6:39:37 PM) Phil: well so after Thursday you go off (6:39:39 PM) Phil: come back (6:39:45 PM) Phil: tell me your done (6:39:47 PM) Phil: and im like ok (6:40:03 PM) Phil: like a couple hours later the irrate side of me gets the better (6:40:16 PM) Phil: and I go over logs and analyze shit that isn't even there (6:40:30 PM) Phil: then finally time gets the better of me (6:40:40 PM) Phil: and my oh shit need to do work goes (6:40:48 PM) Phil: and I do like 7 hours of work through the night (6:41:01 PM) Phil: and finish my hw like 30 min before I leave for class (6:41:29 PM) Phil: I go to school and while im sleep deprived I go into the fuck everything I don't care anymore mode (6:41:41 PM) Phil: and come up with my bad adventure (6:41:42 PM) Quincy: o_o (6:42:00 PM) Phil: and im feeling all fine and tired (6:42:14 PM) Phil: err wait (6:42:16 PM) Phil: this is like (6:42:18 PM) Phil: out of order (6:42:25 PM) Phil: vastly (6:42:34 PM) Phil: not sleeping messes things up (6:42:37 PM) Phil: ok well (6:43:03 PM) Phil: weds you say your done being our respective counsilers (6:43:07 PM) Phil: and im like ok (6:43:13 PM) Quincy: ok (6:43:16 PM) Phil: then next day at school (6:43:22 PM) Phil: im bored and in jap (6:43:33 PM) Phil: and start grinding away in my head analyzing shit (6:43:36 PM) Phil: because I can't help it (6:43:42 PM) Phil: I get back (6:43:56 PM) Phil: and write all my conspiracy theories in like a notepad file (6:44:05 PM) Phil: and tuck it away somewhere in my comp (6:44:10 PM) Phil: and then 20 minutes after that (6:44:18 PM) Phil: I swear to god I don't remember what I wrote (6:44:23 PM) Phil: and like my head was clear (6:44:32 PM) Phil: and it was sweet (6:44:42 PM) Phil: and then I just did normal stuff and wasn't emo (6:44:55 PM) Phil: that night I did my work for like 7 hours (6:45:07 PM) Phil: Thursday after class into Friday morning (6:45:24 PM) Phil: then Friday off of no sleep I come up with my sweet adventure (6:45:40 PM) Phil: come back and your asleep (6:46:13 PM) Phil: even though I planned to vent to you after midterm (as of weds night) but as of then (Friday after class) didn't feel like it anymore (6:46:23 PM) Phil: don't really do much (6:46:40 PM) Phil: later go to vi's place play settlers of catan (6:46:57 PM) Phil: and drink kahlua out of the bottle (6:47:01 PM) Phil: which isn't very strong at all (6:47:13 PM) Phil: and I never actually feel it (6:47:23 PM) Phil: but it looks depressing when I did it im sure (6:47:32 PM) Phil: but yea go back to my place (6:47:40 PM) Phil: 2nd settlers game (6:47:55 PM) Phil: after people leave I see steph on at like (6:47:58 PM) Phil: 1am (6:48:04 PM) Phil: ask her if costco (6:48:38 PM) Phil: end up telling her about the settlers festivities talk for like 20 min straight and I tell her a story about something over summer (6:48:52 PM) Phil: which I think she found amusing (6:49:11 PM) Phil: then I go to bed at like 3 (6:49:36 PM) Phil: wake up see the irc log of her and tar going logging off simultaneously at like 4 am (6:49:51 PM) Phil: then ask nathan what's up and here the 4 of you are out and about all day (6:49:57 PM) Phil: and im sad I watch anime (6:50:06 PM) Quincy: yeah (6:50:17 PM) Quincy: you should probably give up (6:50:19 PM) Quincy: it's pretty clear (6:50:44 PM) Quincy: judging by how they behave around each other (6:50:53 PM) Quincy: and we've seen the simultaneous sign off thing (6:50:56 PM) Quincy: more than just once now (6:51:09 PM) Quincy: we would have to be complete buffoons not to know they have an interest in each other (6:51:16 PM) Quincy: not to mention she said she was interested in him (6:51:21 PM) Quincy: and he said he was interested in her (6:51:27 PM) Quincy: to continue hoping otherwise is just stupid (6:51:31 PM) Phil: man (6:52:03 PM) Phil: like learning that it wasn't me in particular but that I was doing something inherently horrify and didn't know it (6:52:20 PM) Phil: made me feel better because it wasn't my fault per se (6:52:40 PM) Phil: but then seeing her go after tarry, makes me feel a lot worse (6:53:41 PM) Phil: but now im at a point of resignation (6:54:52 PM) Phil: bc of the now concrete info that I have (6:55:16 PM) Phil: as opposed to the wishy washy perspective non-substance bullshit (6:55:42 PM) Phil: btw I haven't done (6:56:07 PM) Phil: the analysis stuff since I wrote shit down on a note pad (6:56:12 PM) Quincy: why would seeing her go after tarry make you feel bad? (6:56:19 PM) Quincy: she likes him (6:56:25 PM) Quincy: it doesnt mean you're not as good or anything (6:56:30 PM) Quincy: it just means she isn't into you in that way (6:56:47 PM) Phil: ok well let me present the feel bad argument (6:58:05 PM) Phil: me? (no because of androphobia) -> ok that's cool I guess, can't really help it -> jk its not androphobia bc she likes some other dude -> aw shit what (6:59:42 PM) Quincy: what the fuck is androphobia (6:59:50 PM) Phil: uh (6:59:53 PM) Phil: fear of men (6:59:58 PM) Quincy: oh (7:00:06 PM) Quincy: yeah she's not afraid of guys (7:00:10 PM) Quincy: otherwise she wouldn't be like (7:00:14 PM) Quincy: anywhere near me either (7:00:16 PM) Phil: god (7:00:18 PM) Phil: no (7:00:22 PM) Phil: I mean the touching (7:00:25 PM) Phil: jeez its like (7:00:31 PM) Phil: the closest applicatble term (7:00:36 PM) Phil: the (7:00:42 PM) Phil: INHERENTLY HORRIFING (7:01:19 PM) Phil: I mean at this point (7:01:24 PM) Phil: there isn't much I can do (7:01:39 PM) Quincy: it wasn't jus the touching (7:01:45 PM) Quincy: it was the "lets get drunk" + touching (7:01:58 PM) Phil: man (7:02:05 PM) Phil: you see (7:02:12 PM) Phil: I can see why that would seem bad (7:02:14 PM) Phil: and odd (7:02:15 PM) Phil: now (7:02:23 PM) Phil: but at that point (7:02:36 PM) Phil: there was no negative reaction that I could see (7:02:51 PM) Phil: I mean (7:03:03 PM) Quincy: she's emotionless around people she doesnt want to be emotional with (7:03:27 PM) Phil: yea I guess (7:03:30 PM) Phil: I mean I can see that (7:04:13 PM) Phil: and I can see where all this negative vibes or whatever are coming from that I apparently sent out (7:04:38 PM) Phil: man I wish I could like (7:04:45 PM) Phil: explain myself to her (7:04:56 PM) Phil: like (7:05:03 PM) Phil: I've never had a gf (7:05:08 PM) Phil: she doesn't know that (I think) (7:05:33 PM) Phil: I've never made out with a chick when or bc I was drunk (she doesn't know that) (7:06:02 PM) Quincy: she doesnt know a lot of things (7:06:02 PM) Phil: I think of her as an intellectual equal, and BECAUSE OF THAT I would like it if she was my gf (7:06:11 PM) Quincy: but she for sure is interested in tarry (7:06:14 PM) Phil: and THEREFORE I did flirty things like touching (7:06:29 PM) Quincy: well (7:06:30 PM) Quincy: you can (7:06:36 PM) Quincy: you can go ahead and explain yourself to her (7:06:42 PM) Phil: and what (7:06:43 PM) Phil: tell her (7:06:48 PM) Quincy: but i dont think it will solve anything but clear your conscience (7:06:49 PM) Phil: that I've talked to you this whole time (7:06:55 PM) Quincy: yeah, you can do that (7:07:02 PM) Quincy: i dont think she's going to get terrimad (7:07:09 PM) Quincy: or if she does (7:07:11 PM) Quincy: it'll probably be at me (7:07:18 PM) Phil: what about usc knowledge (7:07:24 PM) Quincy: um (7:07:25 PM) Phil: like I don't know anything from you (7:07:27 PM) Phil: but I know (7:07:31 PM) Phil: at least 1 main point (7:07:34 PM) Quincy: right (7:07:35 PM) Quincy: as for that (7:07:44 PM) Phil: I mean (7:07:46 PM) Quincy: i'll leave that up to you (7:07:52 PM) Phil: im probably not going to do this (7:07:57 PM) Phil: I don't want to like (7:08:03 PM) Phil: fuck with her head before midterms (7:08:08 PM) Phil: actually (7:08:13 PM) Phil: it might un-fuck with her head (7:08:16 PM) Phil: but I don't know (7:09:39 PM) Quincy: umm (7:09:42 PM) Quincy: it's up to you (7:11:30 PM) Phil: bah (7:11:33 PM) Phil: if I did (7:11:43 PM) Phil: what do you think would happen (7:12:10 PM) Phil: I mean right now I feel like there is this like negative cloud floating around when I talk to her (7:12:39 PM) Phil: like she's willing to talk (7:12:47 PM) Phil: but at the same time kinda wants to avoid me (7:12:54 PM) Phil: like "hey, costco?" (7:13:06 PM) Phil: "no need to study for midterms" (7:13:25 PM) Phil: "studying for Tuesday test > groceires?? better beast through it then" (7:13:29 PM) Phil: ":p" (7:13:47 PM) Phil: then goes and spends the whole day in your group of 4 (7:14:05 PM) Phil: like obviously im making her uncomfortable to an extent (7:14:17 PM) Phil: and if she has a reason to avoid she will (7:14:30 PM) Phil: but at the same time doesn't feel right kicking me to the curb (7:14:39 PM) Quincy: ummm (7:14:46 PM) Phil: I mean that's my read (7:14:51 PM) Phil: you have ACTUAL insight (7:14:59 PM) Quincy: i dont think you actually make her uncomfortable (7:15:12 PM) Phil: man see (7:15:22 PM) Phil: I don't know what the fuck is going on (7:15:28 PM) Quincy: why dont you talk to her then? (7:15:37 PM) Phil: if I talk to her (7:15:40 PM) Phil: about anything (7:15:44 PM) Phil: of this nature (7:15:52 PM) Phil: the fact that I talk to you will come up (7:15:58 PM) Quincy: yeah (7:16:01 PM) Quincy: i'm okay with that (7:21:53 PM) Phil: what if I just linked this whole log, like right now (7:22:18 PM) Quincy: hmm (7:22:20 PM) Quincy: you can (7:22:27 PM) Quincy: it'll explain a lot (7:23:19 PM) Phil: it does include the usc statement, you ok with that (7:24:43 PM) Quincy: umm (7:24:48 PM) Quincy: yeah (7:24:49 PM) Quincy: i guess so (7:25:05 PM) Quincy: lying inherently leads to a larger pile of feces (7:25:06 PM) Quincy: soo... (7:25:07 PM) Quincy: yeah