Matt Sarmiento
GAH WRITING GIRL ON GIRL EROTICA IS HARD!!!!!! I CAN WRITE STRAIGHT GAY COUPLES 3 WAYS GANGBANGS YOU NAME IT BUT NEVER ANY WITHOUT A GUY, WHEN I DO ITS SO BAD I DONT EVEN GET SLIGHTLY TURNED ON.
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:10pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
yo want help
i used to do that shit for a hobby
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:11pm
Matt Sarmiento
I need a girl to help. One that has felt it
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:11pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
no you don't
lol.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:11pm
Matt Sarmiento
I want my eroticas to make people feel it or believe that they were there
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:11pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
dw
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:12pm
Matt Sarmiento
You dont know what an orgasm is like for a girl. You don't know what its like to have your pussy penetrated either with toys or dick
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:13pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i've heard
firsthand accounts.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:13pm
Matt Sarmiento
I'm getting the same. Lol
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:13pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
k have fun
either way there's 2 things you need
1) experience
2) writing skill
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:14pm
Matt Sarmiento
Oh yea. Did I tell you I started cutting my wrists again? And was like suicidal again.
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:14pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
why
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:14pm
Matt Sarmiento
Long story short. I don't want to be here anymore
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:15pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
dude
don't worry.
everyone goes through something like this at some point
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:15pm
Matt Sarmiento
>completely ignores again...
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:15pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i'll always be here to lend an ear
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:16pm
Matt Sarmiento
Yea... can you lend a knife or some rope in that one knot people hang themselves with cus Ik I'll never figure it out myself
Cutting feels really good... like the blood leaving my body is like part of me escaping this existance.
I never felt it like that before but now...
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:18pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i don't know if this is going to change your mind or anything
but no one ever solved any problems by cutting or suicide
things will look up, if you keep facing forward.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:19pm
Matt Sarmiento
I threw away the last thing I could cut with. When I used to cut my mom caught me and locked everything I could use.
Dw. Things this past week have shown me oh hey there's some good in life no matter how shitty it is normally
But like.  This year. In a whole. Has been nothing but shit except for a hand full of things happening.
I got my first kiss. Started talking to and hanging out with India and Kelsey again.
Apparently I'm a really good kisser o.o like a friend was like oh sure I'll help you figure out what it feels like (she's a whore so it was casual) and after we ended up making out for 30 more min b4 school
Like I just wanted to know what it felt like. I feel like I've done everything with kitty already
If anyone asks, she took every virginity.
Is my answer
But in truth that's it!
Oh BTW you want in at my bday party? Its going to be at my house by the pool and I'm going to invite a bunch of friends from the drama group, lots of couples and a LOT of hot girls. If you do want to come just don't freak any out pls you can go play pool or some shit
If you go I'll invite max and flip and Kenny
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:27pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
uh sure
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:28pm
Matt Sarmiento
Don't nerd out too much pls...
Hey. What would you do if I died today
Hey can you send me one of your best stories in chunks
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:42pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i don't have to think about what i would do if you died
because i won't let it happen.
and no i am not comfortable with other people knowing i wrote these
they're posted anonymously on fanfiction.net if you can find them
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:43pm
Matt Sarmiento
I want to know. Please...
And Ok but im lazy to type one out on phone! And Kelsey wants one q.q
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:44pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i'm not willing to consider that outcome
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:45pm
Matt Sarmiento
... I'm not going to do it. Life has been turning around. I even have a social life now. I am just curious to how you would react
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:47pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
so you mean from stuff like natural causes or a car accident or something
hmm
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:48pm
Matt Sarmiento
Yes
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:50pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
idk dude
losing one of my friends is pretty unfathomable.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:51pm
Matt Sarmiento
... god... can I kill myself now... I feel like shit again cus I keep hurting those I love... I honestly think the world would be better if i just died...
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 7:53pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
no one ever solved anything by dying
you would hurt people even more by dying
there are lots of people out there who care for you
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 7:57pm
Matt Sarmiento
... my own parents call me useless brain dead a waste of time and effort and waste of a human being.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:04pm
Matt Sarmiento
I am still curious. Why did you not ask when the first time was when I said I started cutting again
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
3/13, 8:04pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i mean your friends
my parents aren't much better either
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:09pm
Matt Sarmiento
So what? You have a future. You are a literal genius. But look at me. What do you see? When I look in the mirror all I can see is a fat slob who is too lazy for his own good, can't do anything right, only subjects he is good in are ones that don't need effort or are entertaining, no real talents, not appealing, too confident for is own good (as an act to try to rub off on my own personality), absolute trash, can't hold a relationship for his life even one where the girl never wanted to break up EVER, I still found a way to fuck it all up, I am hated for confidence and lack of skill, get depressed when go without gaming, prone to depression attacks and just wants all the pain to stop... but no... no... no matter what I do I either become the Bully who I hate or become bullied. I don't want anyone to get hurt and every time it does happen I end up more hurt.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:12pm
Matt Sarmiento
So please. Tell me how we are similar. Tell me how I have never had a girl crush on me, never ask me out, never been skinny nor attractive, never been the fucking leader of a group, always a follower, and even why I try with a lower skill group, you fuckers (you Justin will others) always laugh at me and tell me how shit I am and not to listen to me. I try to improve as a shotcaller. Naw let's hold every fucking mistake against him.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:17pm
Matt Sarmiento
Oh please go on about how your best friend COMPLETELY RUINED THE RELATIONSHIP WITH THE GIRL YOU LOVE, please tell me how what I like doesn't get me made fun of or bullied.  Please tell more about how even you make fun of the things I like, calling me names. And back to the relationships topic, what about if one of your best friends goes and tells her he is a thirsty bitch don't get back with him
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:20pm
Matt Sarmiento
Please go on about how your family makes you take meds that give you insomnia headaches loss of appetite stomachs aches the urge to pick at your skin stress high bloop pressure all when I could just eat while studying and have the same intended effect.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:28pm
Matt Sarmiento
Please go on about being amazing at everything you do unlike me who is shit. Every time.  How no matter what you do you can't get a certain persons approval. How no matter what you do get scolded. How no matter if I get straight A's all I get is a pat on the back and literally said to, "you did good now do it again." How you are constantly compared to your genius cousins. How no matter what you do you can't live up to your family name. How no matter what, I cant even cry myself to sleep right. Fuck even when I do sleep I fuck up somehow and wake up in the middle of the night. Please go on about how you can never be seen for you.  Can never be appreciated. No matter what.
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 8:28pm
Matt Sarmiento
Ray. I have been jealous of you since day one.
You have the easy version of my life.  To put in game terms. My life is touhou, yours is super Mario world.
You may have Chinese parents. But I have the black of Asian RICH standards parents.
Oh you like naruto? Oh your one of those dumbasses k bye
Literally happened to me the other day.
I am so ugly. 2 DIFFERENT WHORES were ashamed to go out with me
When girls literally line up to ask you out.
Do you not understand how lonely I am. How I love affection but never get any
You always have your group of friends. If always been an outcast, being a leader of a group like you never have to worry about friends to go back to.  They always come to you.
You realize your standards are low compared to my family's
Still waiting for a single reply...
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 9:06pm
Matt Sarmiento
?
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 9:21pm
Matt Sarmiento
?
Matt Sarmiento
3/13, 9:38pm
Matt Sarmiento
You know a reply of any sort would be nice
Matt Sarmiento
6:38pm
Matt Sarmiento
Going to say anything?
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
6:43pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i don't feel inclined to reply to any of this
Matt Sarmiento
6:43pm
Matt Sarmiento
Oh I forgot to add, if I do what you do to your parents when they are mad, I get a lecture WITH my friends there and they have to go home
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
6:45pm
Raymond Kyohei Yuan
i don't want to argue with you out of fear of you doing something stupid ie cutting
but people always want what they don't have
Matt Sarmiento
7:50pm
Matt Sarmiento
I don't have anything to cut with, and also I'm going to get stoned sometime this weekend. So I mean Idc
Matt Sarmiento
7:52pm
Matt Sarmiento
They faded